Thursday, July 27, 2006

Storm Squad tryouts are upon us

Ok, so they're and institution now

The Storm Squad, your Carolina Hurricanes most dubious contribution to the evolution of modern hockey culture, is set to hold tryouts in August. Former Buzz Babes, aspiring singers with wholesome southern girl looks and wavering falsettos, and big fat guys hovering on the verge of cardiac arrest are encouraged to audition.

I think I'd prefer a 2006-2007 squad composed solely of guys like Mike pictured left. If the Canes are not willing recruit gymnast/strippers and embrace the Daisy Duke shorts and plunging halter tops that define the modern cheerleader, then they should just go the regular guy-Texas A&M cheerleading route and create a corps of beer swilling, nacho cheese stained and sweaty Bubbas. They'll look just as good launching t-shirts between periods and hollering from the corners of the 100 level during TV timeouts.

As the sole returning member of a new and improved Storm Squad, and logical heir to the Holly Wilver role, maybe we might one day see Mike busting out a little Barry White during anthem time. "Oh say can you see, baby...Yeah I'm talkin' to you baby..."

In other news, the Detroit Red Wings signed CasonBlog immortal Danny Markov. He went for one year and $2.5 mil. I think JR could have afforded that. Hell, that's Oleg Tverdovsky money...on second thought, maybe that fact alone explains why JR took a pass. Still only have three NHL caliber centermen and a salary commitment of around $39 mil.

3 comments:

The Acid Queen said...

Oh man, I gotta share this entry with Mike. He'll love it--especially the Barry White part.

Chris said...

Former Buzz Babes,

Melissa... mmmm...

CasonBlog said...

Hope there is no mean left in Gene after he gets done Tai Bo. I think he's the most compelling member of the squad.