Monday, March 26, 2007

CB Bad Movie Review-Death to Mimsy

Kill the Wabbit, Kill the Wabbit...

The worst movie I've seen in the last ten years. I heard it had a magical bunny, so I took my youngest to see The Last Mimsy. I teased her on the way to the show by kind of blending in some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles riffs saying the bunny was a robo-ninja created by some ooze. My storyline would have been more compelling.
Here are the critical things you need to know about Mimsy before you throw down a dime on this mess:

1. People in the distant future will eventually come to depend on Intel Corporation for the survival of human civilization.

2. Humans will so pollute the environment that future generations will have to dress in green space alien costumes to avoid contact with contamination. Costumes come complete with huge helmet contraptions with buggy black eyepieces.

3. Once future-civilization takes care of pollution, the world will be covered with wildflowers - no trees to speak of but plenty of wildflowers.

4. In this pollution-free world of the future, kids can fly simply by wearing colorful hemp clothing and translucent non-petroleum based (I'm sure) plastic sandals.

5. Because of the Patriot Act, men in SWAT gear may just appear at your front door and whisk your family away to a secret interrogation facility after a large power outing without a warrant or any prior investigation/surveillance.

There were only two things I liked about this movie. First was the little girl. Rhiannon Leigh Wryn was adorable. Dig that name too. Wonder if she'll grow up to have a raspy voice and wear flowing layers of dance costume inspired clothing every day. I'd wait till her next movie, She'll still be cute.

The other thing I liked was the big green trees and abundant water they showed in and around Seattle. Damn I miss those things out here. And I want a vacation cottage on Whidbey Island with a pull down loft staircase just like the Mimsy family. And unlike Rhiannon and her movie brother, I will just ignore any Al Gore eco-survival lockbox that washes up on the beach. I'm sure that will keep the men in black helicopters out of my back yard.

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